Friday, April 24, 2009
Crocs, shocks and socks..... a modern dilemma
When Crocs first sprung onto the fashion (or lack of) scene, my initial reaction to this bizarre cross between clogs and gardening boots was 'not in my lifetime'. Why on earth would anyone put anything so ugly on their feet?
A while later and, well, I've kind of grown to like them, and in La France Profonde, where comfort and utility take precendence over beauty, I appreciate their usefulness.
So, not long ago I bought myself a natty pair of sky blue ones decorated with flowers. I think it's fair to say that they've hardly been off my feet. They are supremely comfortable, and what's more, they don't make you feet niff. (If only I could persuade DS to wear them!)
But, I've come across a little problem with them. Within a few hours of wearing, I've turned into my very own Van der Graaf generator - and not the 70s prog rock one either. I build up so much static that I'm throwing little bolts of electricity like some sort of modern day Zeus. I've always had a bit of a static problem. I have fond memories of the firework displays that my bri-nylon nightie used to produce as a child not to mention the time in Harvey Nicks when I went to call the lift and a spark of electricity a good 3 centimetres long shot from the end of my finger when I went to press the call button. My loud shout of 'bugger that hurt' drew some very disapproving looks.
The cats don't come near me, having all got shocks when I stroked them, particularly Barney Bananey, who even got a little bolt of static right on the end of his nose. I was on the telephone out on the balcony when I accidentally touched a screw, discharged the static and promptly dropped the telephone over the edge and only minutes later as I walked through the french door back into the dining room, I produced a crackle of static with attendant mini-lightning bolt that even the CH pronounced impressive - and it bloody well hurt too!
So, my dilemma is this. If I wear socks with my Crocs will I have more or less shocks? I'll look pretty stupid but life might be marginally less painful for all of us.